the way she wanted to walk

So many memories of my girl’s younger years have faded-but for some reason, Sophie’s tendency to put her shoes on the wrong feet has stuck with me. She would grab her shoes and put them on before preschool and 9 times out of 10 the left shoe would be on the right foot and the right on the left. I would sometimes suggest they might be more comfortable the other way but her confidence usually quieted my feedback. She was so proud of herself in her independence!

Now she is a high school graduate. The public education part of her life is complete. I realize that she is ending the way she began-on her own terms doing it her own way.

Through elementary school she would receive feedback for being distracted and busy-always talking. I realized that she needed to move and be active after school if she couldn’t be during the day. She had followed her sisters in music lessons which required more attention and sitting. We decided to put her in tumbling. SHE LOVED IT!

In junior high school she took tumbling more seriously. We drove an hour to participate in a gym that was a fantastic fit for her. That meant having home release for her last period. Covid, with its pass/fail setup was also part of her junior high experience. Her outlook that D’s get degrees was solidified.

In ninth grade, it was time to move on from tumbling. She joined Kate on the high school lacrosse team. She was a great defender and even continued over the summers! When she was approaching 16 she wanted a job. She found one at a local gymnastics gym that she loves! She began to take more hours and working more days. It made no room for lacrosse practice or games. And she definitely preferred work over school.

Coaches, friends, school counselors and teachers questioned her priorities and choices. Meaning well, fully having her interest at heart, but pushing back- “you will have your whole life to work.” Sophie remained committed. She has done what she had to, in order to graduate. She is SO excited to be a full time coach. She’s good at it! She loves it! It motivates her to keep up her own skills in the gym! She is learning so much about child development, motivation, and teamwork. She is loyal and committed to this work-and I am really happy for her! She is already living in an apartment, paying rent and making so many great decisions.

It wasn’t always easy to watch her give up, ignore, or under value things that I could see might help her later. It is a HUGE relief that she graduated! Cheering for her walking across the stage on graduation day was a sweet moment! Most of all, I am really grateful that I took a breath, trusted her journey, and like I did during those preschool years, let her choose the way she wanted to walk. We are both better for it.