10-10-1 as a family

We have a money system in our house where our girls pay for their own clothes, entertainment with friends, shoes, spending money for gas, to go out to lunch, etc… Part of earning money within our finances, is to complete checklists. They hate them. They rarely do them. SO their desire for money can be a motivator to do things they might otherwise roll their eyes at…like life coaching. I am drawn to self help resources of all kinds. SO I often find things I know not only benefit me, but really could help all five of us. Danny and I decided a bit ago that we would pay our girls $5 a week to participate in some type of life coaching activity. We have mainly listened to podcasts (like Brooke Castillo, Better Than Happy, and their new favorite, Show Up).

Like I mentioned yesterday, I love the 10-10-1 concept Rachel Hollis teaches in her book GIRL STOP APOLOGIZING so we listened to chapter 12 together around the dining room table. I had pens and paper on the table. As the audio book played, they were taking notes! We paused after Rachel spoke about envisioning your life in ten years. We did the exercise right then together. My girls pushed back a bit on writing about life that far in the future and we encouraged them to pick a year. When two of my girls said, “nothing we are doing today will matter in 10 years” we had a great discussion. I explained how my inattention and lack of drive in high school and the first few years out of high school effected my ability to graduate college in a timely manner. I did it. I graduated at 30, but what could I have accomplished if I had believed in myself earlier? They were back on board. We finished the chapter.

10 dreams…then 1 goal. They were writing their dreams with absolutely no input from us. We actually cautioned about sharing them if they thought they would be influenced by other’s opinions. (who isn’t influenced by other’s opinions…ugggh!) These are YOUR dreams. We did dangle a carrot. If you write down your 10 dreams everyday like Ms. Hollis suggests there will be NO MORE CHECKLISTS…we will pay you your “checklist money.” They were IN!

Their checklists consist of practicing instruments, household responsibilities, exercise, etc… They will still be helping around the house, and taking their turn with what MO needs but they don’t have to spend anytime or energy tracking it. That energy can go toward remembering their dreams and rewriting their goal daily. In my opinion, that will be much more powerful than any checklist we have ever created. The checklists felt like a list of what they haven’t accomplished. Their dreams brighten their futures and motivate them today.

I wasn’t sure if they would like it, or need reminders. The next day two of them had already rewritten their dreams that morning, without any prompt from Danny or I. (YAY!) The other completed it excitedly in the evening. I am so excited for us. Some daily goals are hard, but when it is something that feels so good to do, there is a bit more motivation behind it.

I am amazed by all of the fantastic resources out in the world that are free, or very inexpensive. The tools and motivation found in podcasts and audio books are incredible. I could listen all day. I have tried to make sure they are off when my girls are in the car…that we are talking or listening to music so I don’t oversaturate that for them. As Rachel said in this chapter, “If everything is important, nothing is important.” Even though I love all of theses resources I am learning to slow down…and instead of consuming too much, start listening less and putting into practice more. If I only have these on for my girls during our “life coaching time” they will be more likely to listen and take it seriously. Having said all of that, are there any podcasts or audio books that you know I would LOVE?