like learning an instrument

I read on one of the almost 100 mother’s day posts that I saw yesterday-

“…because she enjoyed us so much, she taught me to enjoy my own children.”

That isn’t an exact quote, but gives the full idea. It was my favorite thing I read yesterday. EnJOY! EnJOY life…motherhood…relationships! Even the messy, complicated, difficult, exhausting parts.

The card Danny gave me for Mother’s Day had this photo on the front. I took this of Ellie when she was playing one afternoon. Her fingers move so beautifully as she plays guitar.

I have loved guitar so much since I was a teenager. My dad loved having friends over for dinner. Our family’s dear friend, Jim Earp, brought his guitar over and we would gather and sing. He always wears a big smile when he plays. His singing voice is often accented with one of the most infectious laughs I have been around. It was a collective joy one felt lucky to be around.

Danny gifted me my first guitar for our first Christmas together. I was completely surprised. He bought it at a guitar shop in Salt Lake City and somehow got it to California, where we were spending Christmas. How did he do that!? I have had at least 4 guitar teachers and been an owner of at least one guitar for the past 25 years. I am a very mediocre guitar player. I realize this morning, the missing ingredient-

joy.

I am learning in life to let go of perfect. Let go of expectation. Live in the moment. Love what is today. When we have an expectation of what life should look like, we add so much frustration and misery. What if we let it go? What if we instead see with eyes gratitude and joy? The harmony of life is much more beautiful through those lenses. I have known and understood this for a long time, but FINALLY, I think it is sinking deeper and deeper into my heart, right where it belongs.

Maybe it’s time to pick up my guitar again- not with an expectation to be perfect…just for the joy of making music.