stand your sacred ground

I happened upon Brooke Castillo’s 5-minute emotional makeover last week.  I listen to her podcast regularly but had never heard this podcast.  I decided to give it a try.  I had been feeling a lot of anxiousness lately and thought it would be great to get a handle on it. or understand it. or get to the bottom of it.  or something.

As I went through her steps, I noticed quickly that it wasn’t anxiousness at all, it was fear.  That seemed really clear to me- but what am I afraid of!?  I had done this in the evening.  The next morning, I still recognized the fear-but had no idea what I am actually afraid of.  What is the sentence that I am telling myself that is causing the fear that I am feeling?  I said my prayers, like usual, and pleaded, “please tell me the thought I am holding that is causing my fear.”  I began to journal and the thought came immediately-

Memories became clear.  Instances, especially growing up, where I was given a strong message…be small, be quiet, blend in, don’t stand out, don’t disrupt.  be small.  I think society, especially in my era, was  IS a strong teacher of this to girls…and some of us are really sensitive to it…and jump in…believing every lie it has to offer.  be small.

I thought about it for a few days.  What do I want to replace that thought with?  What is it’s opposite?  BE LARGE?  BE BIG?  BE BOLD?  maybe.

I ran across a thought (from Brene Brown) that I loved…here (who I didn’t follow by the way, and I am not sure how I got to her page. I follow her now!)

I thought of this photo I took of Kate and Ellie in Southern, CA.  I love their stances against the powerful waves coming their way.  It’s my new phone screen saver.

I look at it over and over again.  Every time I open my phone.  DON’T SHRINK!  Don’t make myself smaller than I am.  Don’t diminish who I am or what I want.  DONT’ PUFF UP!  I am not better than anyone else.  I don’t have anything to prove.  Give and love so that we are all standing together…being us-  STANDING OUR SACRED GROUND.